One of the moments that accompanies the intimate relationship between a man and a woman is assumptions.
- Agree, you often assume that a man
- receives love in the same form as you give it
- expects from marriage the same as you
- understands the meaning of the words “loyalty” and “family” as well as you.
And this list of assumptions can be continued for a very long time.
But if you let go of at least part of these assumptions, the psychology of the relationship between a man and a woman will become much simpler and more understandable.
Remember and take the habit of using 3 questions, which I will tell you now, and I promise that most negative emotional experiences will disappear from your relationship.
What do you expect from the relationship?
Or why do you have a relationship? Meeting and trying to get in touch with men who ended up parting as a result, women often experience frustration, pain, rejection of themselves, etc.
Basically this happens because it is too late to realize that there is a person next to whom the views on life and the relationship between a man and a woman are completely different from yours.
Be honest with yourself about what kind of man you need. Have the courage to identify your requirements to a potential lover at an early stage of the beginning relationship.
Do you want to have children? Want a partner who will be kind and compassionate? Do you want to meet a man equal in intelligence to you? What other wants are there?
Yes, do not ask directly the man on the first dates “What do you expect from a relationship?”. After all, such a question you can push him away. He may not be ready to give an immediate answer. Try to ask leading questions on this topic.
For example, “What do you like about women?”, “What women attract you?”. Such questions will prompt what exactly is important to a man in relations with the opposite sex. And as a result, they will give an answer to what he expects from communicating with you.
How can I show my love to you better?
When you ask this question, being already in a relationship (on the 10th date, on the 2nd or the 50th year of living together), it does not matter.
Find out from your partner all about how he wants you to love him . How exactly does he feel that you love him. After all, each person has his own language of love.
Some need more personal space and time, while others need constant emotional and physical contact.
One likes to talk constantly, the other is just to hold hands silently.
What you perceive as love in relation to yourself, is not always perceived on his part.
If you feel that the psychology of the relationship between you is permeated with such misunderstandings, I recommend going to your lover and asking directly: “Tell me, how can I give you even more love?” . And after carefully listening to the answer to this question, start loving him the way he wants.
Or, if you are not able to translate his wishes into life, it is worth accepting the bitter truth that it will be better for you to part.
This is the correct psychology of the relationship between a man and a woman – if you can not give what he wants as a man, it’s better to let go.
It was able to understand and start to apply in life one beautiful girl who was my listener. Now everything is good with her personal life:
How am I recently coping with the role of your girlfriend (wife)?
This question is the hardest to ask. But if each of us had the courage to ask a similar question to his partner, this would lead to the fact that the relationship between a man and a woman in whom problems have appeared can be saved by starting a dialogue. And this, in turn, would reduce the number of divorces in the world at least twice.
But why is this question rarely asked? The thing is that most often there is no desire (there is fear) to know the answer to it. Of course, it is much easier to assume that you are doing everything right, than to ask and learn about the need to make changes in your behavior.
Is not it?
But here’s the thing. Sometimes the relationship between a man and a woman is arranged in such a way that this question is perceived as an offer to express one’s expectations or something negative that can cause problems in the pair.
The above question should be taken as a continuation of learning – “How can I love you even better?” . After all, the fact that you are asking this is already a manifestation of love for your partner.
This is successfully mastered by one of my students and now, according to her, she knows her man much better:
I do not need it, everything is so good
Sometimes the relationship between a man and a woman is very successful. And there is no need for such questions. Perhaps you really are all in perfect order.
But most likely, you just do not have the courage necessary for dialogue with your loved one on similar topics. Find the strength to at least try to do it.
After all, even attempts to ask one of these questions are proof of the sincerity of your feelings.
Such acts can be performed only by those who find the strength to choose love instead of fear, which permeated very many relations between a man and a woman.
If you are at the stage of acquaintance, start it with “What do you expect from a relationship?” .
If the relationship has already formed, or at least you have been meeting for a long time, ask your man: “How can I love you better?” .
And, finally, if you have a clear understanding of what a partner wants to feel loved, ask him the question: “How have I been doing it recently with the role of your girl (wife)?” .
These are three important questions that you can ask your man, so that the psychology of the relationship between you will reach a qualitatively new level.
Thank you for the read. I look forward to the comments.