Did you have to tell a man about his misconduct and observe a negative reaction in response?
Have you thought about how to correctly tell a man that he is doing something wrong, and yet not stumble upon a wall of misunderstanding and irritation on his part?
Are you tormented by the thought that your faulty words and actions were the fault of the quarrel? Or, perhaps, it began to seem to you that he needs a special approach and you are desperate?
In the responses to articles that we publish, women sometimes talk about their fear of telling men what we advise. And suddenly he will not react so, and we will be guilty! Perhaps you were in this situation.
In this article, you have to find out how to tell a man that he is wrong and get a positive reaction.
Think about what it is worth to say to a man!
I’m not tired of reminding you that communication is a necessary component of a truly happy relationship. This is the foundation. The only indisputable fact, despite the fact that we all have different expectations, points of view and even the languages we speak.
It is often said that women are more emotional, and men are more logical during communication. This may be true, but it is also true that men instinctively want to make their women happy and try their best to accomplish this task.
Even if a woman thinks that this is not so.
These are not unconditional templates. Most often this is the case. I’m sure that every relationship is unique and requires some help when choosing priorities at the very beginning. The future of your relationship depends on how you act at this stage.
Let’s consider the following situation: after each meeting with ignorant or rude men (at least, they seem like this), women are increasingly upset and increasingly believe in the successful future of any relationship. As a result, a cycle is formed, which looks something like this:
- A man does not know how to make a woman happy, because she does not talk about it ;
- A woman gets tired of a man who does not make any effort to understand it, or at least try to learn how to do it. At the same time, she also does not know how to tell a man about a painful one;
- A man feels hopeless and begins to distance himself from his partner , feeling that he can not do anything right;
- A man or a woman surrenders and throws the issue that has arisen unresolved.
This cycle continues until one of them survives and refuses to continue the relationship that has reached a dead end.
Who is to blame for this? The answer is simple – no one . It’s only an ineffective communication within the pair.
So, how can we break this pattern? What to say to a man so as not to cause his negative reaction?
For example, how to tell a man that you do not have enough of his attention, he did not call on time and eventually came home late? Most likely you will say this:
- “I think you ignore me.”
- “Why did not you call me when you promised?”.
- “You should have told me that you’ll be late.”
It is not difficult to say these words to a man. In addition, most women use them every day to communicate with their loved ones without even realizing that they make a mistake. In the understanding of a man, you focus on these phrases on the fact that he did something wrong. This humiliates him and puts a negative imprint on his self-esteem and attitude towards you.
How in this case does he react? Sometimes he is silent, in other cases he is hostile to you. But regardless of the type of reaction, he hears the same message: “You are unable to do it right. You are not responsible for your actions and words. ”
And what if the man is saying the same thing, but changing some accents?
For example, you can consider these options:
- “If you do not answer me, I feel neglected.”
- “When you do not call, it makes me feel that I’m not important to you.”
- “When you do not tell me that you will be late, I feel that you do not appreciate my time.”
We guarantee that in this case you will receive from him a completely different answer. Unclear silence or hostility certainly will not.
” Feel . ” There is some magic in this word. While communicating with a man, pay attention to how his reaction will change when you tell him how his actions make you feel .
As we have said, his main mission is to make you happy. If he knows that his actions make you feel different, he will wake up and try to better understand the situation.
This will sound like a call for cooperation, not a proposal to take an aggressive stance.
This will encourage him to act instead of kneeling.
So he will feel that you are communicating with him, rather than pointing out his shortcomings.
That’s the whole secret. Just one word!
Is that all?
It may seem too simple – but it’s true. When we (men) say that we are the simplest beings, we really mean it. We want to make you happy, but sometimes we need help and patience to figure out how to do it.
Therefore, the next time you disagree with his actions or words, do not point out mistakes and do not defend your point of view. Better try to understand how to tell a man that his actions make you feel a certain way.
Now that you know what to say and what word will help you reach the heart of a beloved man , your relationship will simply have to reach a whole new level.
Do not forget to thank me in the comments for the key to this knowledge. Try to apply this advice today and be sure to write in the comments about the result. We will wait!