Perhaps you are stubborn or do not know how to listen.
Or maybe you behave passively, aggressively, when your man annoys you.
Each of us has excellent personality traits that draw other people into our lives.
There are also bad features, without which relations would be built better.
But what are your qualities that cause the most harm to the relationship?
I’ve watched couples for many years and can name four character traits that exactly spoil your relationship with a man.
If you need rules of communication with a man and you want to know how to arrange a man for yourself, read on.
1. You do not listen
We see the world from our point of view, through the prism of tastes and customs. We do not often think about the fact that there are other ways to assess people and their actions.
This inability to see the situation from the perspective of another person is the reason why you are a bad listener. And this is a serious problem, because you do not have the opportunity to understand a man.
I interviewed hundreds of people and asked them to describe the most successful relationship. All the time I heard the same thing: “My words were heard, my actions were noticed, and I was accepted as I am.”
Say: “I heard you and I understand you as a man. You’re tired after work, so here’s a salad – eat it to restore strength. ”
If you can listen to your man and leave him with the feeling of being heard – this will greatly strengthen your relationship. You will become that woman who hears and understands her man. So, he respects.
2. You make guesses
One of your rudest female mistakes is to think that a man always understands what you want to tell him. Most often this is not so. It is very important to clarify this point. Ask him if he understood what you said to him and whether he heard you. Only do it gently and in a feminine way, as I teach you on the “Ways of a Woman” .
Say: “Dear, I am very worried that you misunderstood me when I asked you for a new dress. Tell me, silly, did you hear my request. Do not think that I reproach you. I’m just asking myself to understand for myself. ”
Often it seems to us that the partner heard absolutely everything that we wanted to convey. In fact, it takes time to get your point of view as detailed as possible and make sure that you understand each other.
3. You do everything the way you want
We often try to make a person look like us. That he was fond of the same hobby, laughed at the same jokes, listened to the same music.
If it’s about you, stop until it’s too late. It is better to learn to accept your man as he is. Rejoice that you are different. Do not take your dissimilarity as a problem.
My advice to you is to do to others as you want them to do to you. This is a more special kind of respect.
Say: “Of course, beloved, I do not mind that you went on a hunt with friends on Saturday. And at this time I’m going to the exhibition with my girlfriend. ”
4. You are stubborn and you argue
Obstinacy can be very good quality – it makes you strong and helps you get the position of department head. But this is not the quality that you should show in a relationship with a man.
Stubbornness can be seen when a person behaves specifically: there are people with passive aggression (trying to freeze the conflict), people with aggressive aggression (behave especially loudly and categorically during a conflict) and people with a mixed type.
It is important to understand which of these types is you, and which is your man. If you spend a lot of time trying to stay right, the relationship gets worse.
For example, if your man with passive aggression, and you – with active aggression, he can not quickly finish the problem and will try to suppress the situation. It will irritate you. You will provoke it and call it insensitive.
Do not do that. Try to realize the likelihood that you both can be right. Analyze what you did from what could disappoint your partner and apologize for it.
Say: “Forgive me, silly, that I argued with you. You are my man – then you are right. ”
When you do this, your man will be much easier to admit his wrong and also apologize to you. Naturally, he can continue to get angry. So – the problem is in it, not in you. But for most couples, the word “I’m sorry” immediately kills all negative energy.
Now you know the basic rules of communicating with a man and how to arrange for a man. Do you want to know more? Comment now.