How to cope with dependence on men?

The phrase “I love him so much that I can not live without him” causes us some admiration – they say, this is love, this is the feeling.

But in fact, there is nothing good in being completely incapable of imagining a life without a man.

Mutual strong love, when one does not want to see anyone next to someone else, but only his chosen one, really deserves respect.

But the inability to remain alone with oneself, believing that only your individual condition (his presence, opinion, mood, etc.) depends on your condition, is nothing but a voluntary rejection of the inner freedom that every woman needs so much, No matter how strong the relationship may be.

“He leaves – and I go out, I do not want anything, the world is painted gray, everything is meaningless. He comes – and I’m shining, twisting, preparing, in general, he is for me – a source of energy and strength “, – those women who sincerely think so are wrong.How to cope with dependence on men?

Not a source of strength and energy is for them a man, and a drug, and quite strong, able to drive into a state of depression, when everything falls from the hands and do not want to live.

As a rule, such an attitude towards the chosen one says that the woman is not self-sufficient, does not appreciate her “I” and sees herself only next to someone, but not just one.

She is too painful to be separated from her beloved, even the shortest, depends on his opinion and mood, does not represent that you can buy something without consulting a partner, and very worried if her choice was not approved.

All these torments do not make any of the beloved happy.

The man, after all, understands that there is too much in his life, and loses interest, because he sees that everything he wanted has already been achieved. A woman suffers when, for whatever reason, she does not receive the much-desired “dose” in the form of his attention, approval, or simply being present side by side.

Of course, it’s possible that in your case everything is not so exaggerated, but if you notice that you also want to get under the blanket when the relationship with your loved one does not go well, he does not call or goes on a business trip, that is, an occasion to reflect, Are you from your man?

It may well be that our advice will be useful to you.

Do not shift responsibility

We have already said more than once in our articles that most people like to shift responsibility for everything that they feel, or for everything that happens to them, to others.

It is so much easier to remain right in your own eyes, not guilty of any turmoil, saying: “He did not come, because of this I was upset.” But the problem is that you yourself allowed yourself to be upset.

Yes, maybe the meeting that was planned was broken, he was detained at work, but you did not even try to spend some time differently in the time that was freed; instead, you preferred to put on the mask “I am in sorrow” and again pull on the head a blanket .

Remember: it’s not a man who makes you happy, only you let him do that.

Do not put too much hope

If your relationship is at an early stage, and you already feel that the lack of his calls makes you nervously walk back and forth around the apartment, then imagine, like it’s just a fleeting connection, no more.

The thought that this is love forever, forever (at least on your part), in this situation will not help to remain calm.

Imagine that a crowd of the same admirers waits for you outside the door, and with a cold head get down to your business.

Call – well, no – well, the world will not turn from it, the end of the world will not come.

Find a favorite business

Dependence makes no one happy, because once a person is selected, he becomes vulnerable and sometimes experiences quite severe suffering. But if now you are addicted to your man, try to find another drug in the form of a loved one.

Immerse yourself in something that distracts you from thinking about a partner.

Feel the hobby brings you happiness. And you will be surprised that you can sit in a master class on decoupage and experience genuine joy, despite the fact that your man is far away.

Feel yourself desirable, then you will stop literally pulling your attention out of your chosen one.

Communicate

Man is a social being. Well, he can not sit in four walls and wait every evening for a loved one from work, like the sun in a window.

You just need to give emotions and energy to someone else: friends, relatives, colleagues, even other men, if you do not allow anything more than an easy flirtation.

By the way, the latter is a great way to raise self-esteem. Feel yourself desirable, then you will stop literally pulling your attention out of your chosen one.

Give him the opportunity to take the initiative

Women who are addicted to men do everything for them – they call 15 times a day, offer to go to a cafe or a movie, ask about how the day went and talk about themselves without waiting for a mutual question.

In general, wanting to fill the emotional void that is formed every time it disappears from sight, the girls completely deprive men of the opportunity to take the initiative.

Stop beating him, he might like to call you, but that’s all it’s for – you just hung up.

By the way, as soon as you see that he is attentive and, most importantly, wants it, your dependence will become slightly weaker, because we always desperately want what’s harder to get.

2017-08-23T14:30:43+00:00

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