Now we know that you feel very good when someone becomes jealous of your suit and your car but you just become evil when you see someone having a better-looking car and ever professional look suit then you have.
It’s the same thing and you should consider learning it so you can get some help in healing this problem with you.
The paradox of jealousy, as well as the causes of jealousy, lies in the fact that we all want, to one degree or another, to be jealous of us.
In small doses, it is an expression of care.
Feeling of jealousy as a fear of losing we perceive as an attachment, loyalty to another person.
The threat to lose someone is a test of how much you value him.
Although the perception that caused jealousy and determined the causes of jealousy, can be distorted, the pain it causes real. The neural circuit, which underlies our psychological response to such social phenomena as how to be rejected, is the same scheme that underlies the simplest physical pain and pleasure.
According to the studies of Japanese neuroscientists, envy and jealousy activate the anterior part of the cingulate gyrus of the cerebral cortex.
And the stronger the emotion, the more activation happens.
We tend to have a positive image of ourselves, and we experience discomfort when positive self-esteem comes into conflict with external information of other people.
This also applies to what we can designate as causes of jealousy and envy.
Scanning the brain at the earliest stages of manifestation of jealousy showed some significant gender differences in neural responses to sexual and psychological infidelity.
- In men, areas that are rich in testosterone receptors and are involved in sexual and aggressive behavior are activated.
- In women, on the contrary, especially in response to thoughts of emotional infidelity, more is activated the area involved in the detection of deception and reliability, as well as a violation of social norms.
Women are particularly sensitive to changes in the mind of a partner.
The emotional sensitivity of women can explain why the reasons for their jealousy are not limited to romantic relationships.
Women can be jealous of women’s friendship, Experiencing anger, a sense of loss and betrayal, when a friend pays more attention to another friend.
Learn jealousy as a test
After jealousy has settled in the repertoire of human emotions, who can argue that the causes of jealousy cannot be used strategically?
In fact, according to psychological research, 40 to 45 percent of women deliberately provoke a little jealousy in a partner to make sure of the strength of the connection.
Men do this too, but not as often as women do.
Because of jealousy, especially in the early stages of relationships, correlates with care. Intentional provocation of this feeling can be a way of checking:
if your partner does not answer, then it is not safe
The general tactic to cause causes of jealousy includes – talking about a former or another man in the presence of a partner, talking to another man at a party or even getting to know another man, talking about the dignity of other men.
And nothing is more effective than flirting with another man. In this very little risk. It’s hard to blame a woman for being “just being polite” or “friendly.”
Women can also provoke a small jealousy when they perceive a partner as less interested in a relationship than they are. The goal is to change the perception of their partners.
“No one wants to be with a man whom no one wants,” psychologists say. “If no one wants them, people start taking each other for granted.”
How not to damage the relationship because of jealousy
There are some effective steps to restrain jealousy and not to let it harm the relationship. Family psychologists offer several options.
By the general rule of protection from jealousy, cherish your relationship. Take time to be together and spend time talking. It is important to share your inner world with each other.
These simple actions will help to effectively Neutralize the causes of jealousy.
Decide whether you want to talk about your suspicions or not. If you feel apprehensive or unsure about your partner – do not let your assumptions control you. Check them with your partner.
But first, think about how to put your thoughts in words.
The goal is to start a conversation not militantly, be constructive and not blame.
To avoid an automatic defensive reaction in the partner, use messages that start with “I”, not “you.”
Identify the behaviors of your partner that upset you, that is, the causes of jealousy, and explain how it makes you feel.
Pause to make sure that your partner is listening, and give your partner time to react.
The sincere conversation will help you dispel your fears and doubts and eliminate the causes of jealousy.